


We Are Number One

by MadDramaQueen



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Happy Birthday Tats!, Hey hey!, This Is For You, because you are number one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-10-11 15:52:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10468602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadDramaQueen/pseuds/MadDramaQueen
Summary: Someone sends a very interesting package to Achievement Hunter, and they decide to use it to bring as much chaos to Rooster Teeth as possible.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Birthday to Tats, an amazing friend who has brought me into the wonderful world of the best meme ever. And I am a big LazyTown fan! How did I miss this?! Anyway, she wanted a surprise fic for her birthday, soooo...why not combine the meme with Achievement Hunter?
> 
> Here we go!

It was a normal day in the Achievement Hunter office. Well, as normal as things can get, anyway. Everyone, except for Michael were by their computers, editing or playing video games.

"Hey, assholes! Mail's here!" Michael came in the AH office with his hands full of letters and dumped them all over Gavin's head.

"Micool! Wot're you doing?" Gavin squawked.

"Delivering the mail, dumbass! And no, all those letters aren't for you. It's better than garbage being dumped on your head, and you already know what that's like." Michael chuckled.

Gavin grumbled and picked up the fan mail from the ground and around his desk. "You're so mean to me boi." he whined.

Jon Risinger kicked at the door moments later. "Open the door! My hands are full of boxes!"

"You're not moving in here, Risinger! We don't have room!" Jack smirked. 

"It's more mail from fans, genius. If I move in, I want to sit next to Ryan, anyway."

Ryan chuckled and got up to open the door. "That means you're gonna have to go, Jack."

"Fuck you." Jack jokingly flipped him off.

Ryan opened the door, just in time to catch some toppling packages from Jon's hands. "Whoa! How'd you manage to get over here with all these and then drop them at the door?"

Jon and Ryan carried the packages to the bean bags and dropped them there. Jon brushed his hair back and sighed. "I mean, if people were running all over the place and Gus saw me, this would've ended a lot differently." Jon smiled and gave Ryan a smile and a pat on the back. "Thanks, buddy. See you later. Bye, guys! Enjoy your mail!" Jon waved to the others and left. 

Jeremy got up from his desk and started rummaging through the boxes. He starts tossing some to the side, as if he's looking for a specific one. "I'm trying to see which one we can open on AHWU."

"Pick a good one, Lil J!" Gavin cheered.

Jeremy stopped when he found a big box with a purple bow on the top of it. "This one is calling my name."

"How's it calling you? 'Hap hap! Hap hap hap hap!' Or is it more Boston? Like, 'HEY! Git ova here!" Michael asked as the Monster Truck chuckled.

"There's a purple bow on it. I like it. Let's open it." Jeremy put the box on Geoff's desk and everyone else got up to look at it."

"Who's it from, Jeremy?" Jack asks.

"Uhh...someone named Tats." Jeremy read from the box.

"Tats? That name sounds familiar..." Ryan muttered.

"Let's open it, then!" Gavin pushed past Jeremy and started to tear the box open. Michael rolled his eyes and pushed him back.

"Let's be civil with the fan mail, idiot. Open it normally!" Michael took one of the throwing knives from the wall and started stabbing the top of the box furiously. "YAAHHHH!! OPEN UP, YOU STUPID BOX!!"

Jack laughed while Ryan facepalmed and took the knife away from Michael. "Now, if this is the Tats I'm thinking of, she wouldn't approve of her mail being destroyed like this. I think you've opened it enough anyway." He slowly opens the rest of the box from the top and reaches inside. "A note. Okay." He takes out a folded piece of paper and unfolds it.

"Read it, Ryan! What does it say?" Gavin asks with excitement.

"It says, 'Dear Achievement Hunter, I've recently exposed a friend to a meme on the internet. So, I've decided to bring you guys into it, as well. Hope you can bring some shenanigans into your day and show the rest of Rooster Teeth how it feels to be number one! Love, Tats.'"

"A meme? Umm...I'm terrified now." Jack chuckles. "What the hell could it be?"

"Uh, guys? What the hell are these?" Ryan pulls out 5 plastic bags with a long-sleeved purple turtleneck and dark red striped vest and pants to go with it. "There's one for each of us." He starts handing them out.

"Are we supposed to wear these? These look ridiculous!" Jack unfolds his striped pants. "Who wears these?!"

"Oh, wait. This looks familiar somehow. I think Lindsay showed me something. Hold on." Michael sits at his computer and pulls up YouTube. "Uh, what the fuck is that song called again?"

"Darude Sandstorm?" Gavin laughs and starts humming the tune with Lil J beatboxing behind him.

"You guys are idiots. No, no, no. Uh...Ah! Got it! Watch this, guys." They crowd around Michael's computer to find a video called "We Are Number One" from a children's show called LazyTown playing on his screen.

"Oh...my God. Tats, what did you do?" Ryan watched in shock as Jeremy cracked up laughing.

"That's who we're gonna dress as?? I love it!" Jeremy laughed.

"So, it's one guy teaching the others how to be villains? I can't see this going well at all." Ryan said.

"Well, that's perfect for us, then! Try teaching us to be villains, Ryan!" Gavin exclaimed.

"What? Me? Why me?" 

"You're the fucking Mad King, dude! You're the evilest one here! Well, Jeremy is a close second. He's learning from you, Ryan." Michael shrugged.

Ryan gives Jeremy a high-5. "What can I say? Team Battle Buddies stick together."

"Hell yeah, buddy!" Jeremy smiled.

"The last time I tried to teach one of you to be evil, I was defeated by the power of friendship." Ryan glared at Team Nice Dynamite.

"Yeah, boi!" Michael gave Gavin a thumbs up.

"We're not really gonna be villains anyway. It's just for fun, and it would make great content. And we all know how much you love that, Ryan. So, what do you think? Will a video of 5 idiots dressed like Robbie Rotten go well for the channel?" Jack asked.

Ryan looked around at all the hopeful faces, especially Gavin's face, which meant he really wanted to do this. He took a deep breath, then exhaled and gave his classic troublemaking smirk.

"Now, listen closely..."  
__________________________________

Burnie was walking to the kitchen to get himself a snack, when he suddenly felt a CRUNCH beneath his feet.

"What the hell...?"

He looked down to see a bunch of leaves and twigs piled on top of each other.

"Okay. Who did this?"

"What the hell was that??" Burnie could hear Ryan exclaim. 

"Gavin, you idiot!" That was Michael.

Burnie sighed. "Achievement Hunters? All right, guys. Come on out of hiding. I can hear your loud asses."

One by one, in comical fashion, their heads popped out from behind a door. And out they walked in their Robbie Rotten costumes (with a little Rimmy Tim style for Lil J) with Michael pushing Gavin out. 

"What the fuck?! You don't put a leaf pit trap inside a building! Who's gonna fall down it?" Michael yelled.

"Er, ants."

Jeremy facepalmed while Jack started laughing. "Oh yeah, we'll show those ants, huh? They'll never fuck with us again, those goody two shoe ants!"

Burnie was laughing himself, seeing the state of one of the most popular groups in Rooster Teeth. "Wha-? Why are you guys dressed like that?" 

"For content." Ryan nods.

"Also because a fan sent them, and we know we'd look stupid in them." Michael shrugged.

"To be honest, I kinda like it. And this has some Rimmy Tim in it. I'm a fan." Jeremy nods.

"I'm trying to teach these idiots how to be villains like in the video these outfits are from. I think that Robbie guy had better luck than me. I mean, come on. I have Rage Quit, Monster Truck, Gavin and Beardo. Oooh~! Be afraid, world." Ryan rolls his eyes while waving his hands in an afraid, sarcastic manner.

"Wot? I tried! I bet I did some real damage to Burnie's shoes!" Gavin stated proudly.

"No...No, you didn't." Burnie looked down at his shoes to find them 100% clean.

"I don't think you're cut out to be a villain, Gav." Jeremy said. 

"I'm Vav, for crying out loud! Of course I can't be a villain, you knobhead!" Gavin rolled his eyes. "Burnie, you could at least pretend to fall down the pit, so I feel a little good about myself."

Burnie looked at the pit, looked back at Gavin and sighed. He starts dramatically flailing his arms as he sinks to the ground. "Oh, ahhhh! Ahhhh! I'm falling...somewhat...into this very small, not so deep, or very convincing pit covered with leaves and shit from outside the studio! Oh, the horror!"

Gavin shook his head, and chuckled lightly. "You suck, Burns. You pleb." 

"Gavvy's number one! HEY! HEY!" Michael sang.

"Damn right, boi." 

Ryan chuckled. "All right. We've obviously failed here. Let's try something else, guys."

The Achievement Hunters walked away, plotting their next move. Burnie sighed at the literal mess beneath his feet.

"They're not gonna come back to clean this, are they? Man, fuck those guys!"  
\------------------

"Can't we just prank call Geoff? This is stupid, Ryan!" Gavin whined from the On The Spot set. The villains in training were trying to untangle a net that Ryan found in the prop room.

"This damn net better work. This is worse than wringing Christmas lights! There's knots everywhere! UNTANGLE, YOU FUCKER!!" Michael raged.

"It'll all be worth it once we trap Risinger and we never have to be on his show again!" Ryan rubbed his hands together gleefully.

"You broke the Golden Gus twice. I highly doubt you'll be on his show again, Ryan." Jack pointed out.

"What do we do after we throw the net and trap him?" Lil J asked.

"Uhhh...I mean, I haven't gotten that far yet. Let's just worry about- He's coming! He's coming! I can hear him talking to Barbara! When I say 'go,' be ready to throw. Hide!" Ryan prepared. They all hid behind the couch, which was a tight fit, but they made it work.

"...and then Matt tells me, 'I'm on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.'" they can hear Barbara laugh with Jon groaning afterwards.

"God Damn it, Barb!" Jon sighed as they walked to his host podium.

"GO!"

The villains in training threw the net...over Ryan's head.

"Oops!" Gavin chuckled as Michael cackled loudly.

"Free Ryan 2017! Hahahahaha!!"

Jon and Barbara looked at them, equally confused.

"Why are you dressed like that? Ryan, that net makes your outfit look even more amazing." Jon smirked.

"Fuck you, Risinger." Ryan flipped him off, then glared at the others. "THROW IT AT HIM, NOT ME! What the hell?!" Ryan sputtered and made his video game death noises trying to get it off. "agh, gagah, bragadgag..."

"Hold on, Haywood. Let me help." Barbara chuckled and helped the others get the net off Ryan. "There you go."

"Barbara's number one! HEY! HEY!" Michael and Jeremy sang.

"Ryan, this isn't going well, is it?" Gavin asked. Ryan rubbed his temples.

"Nope. But, it's Achievement Hunter. Nothing goes well with us."

"Is that...? Why are you all Robbie Rotten?" Barbara asked. Ryan explained to them both about the package, the meme and the video.

"Well, if you're learning how to be villains, you're learning from the expert." Barbara pointed at Ryan, but he just shook his head.

"I must suck as a teacher! Even the most trivial of villainous acts can't be pulled off by these guys."

"Well, I thought we would learn something more...crazy." Jeremy shrugs.

"I can't do that in these silly outfits!" 

Jon gives Ryan a hug. "I think it's very nice. You pull it off well, Ryan. But, since you've tried to net me, I'm gonna put you on the show for this week."

"God damn it."

Jack chuckled and patted Ryan on the shoulder. "Plan totally backfired there, Ryan!"

Ryan sighed. "I guess I'm going into deep space again."  
\----------------------------

"So, what're we doing, Ryan?" Gavin asked, holding his phone to record. This time, they were back in the Achievement Hunter office.

"All right. So, here's the deal. Outside the door, we have about...5 or 6 banana peels dropped on the floor. See?" Ryan opens the door slightly to reveal banana peels strategically placed. 

"We've reached a new low, boys. We're literally clowns now. The creepy ones at the circus who think this shit is funny. Ryan, what the hell, man?" Michael shook his head.

"It was in the video! We have to try it!" Ryan replied.

"Who are our targets, anyway?" Jack asked. "And will they even fall for this?"

"It's Funhaus, so of course they will. They chose the wrong day to come visit us." Ryan smirks. 

"So, wot's gonna happen is, they're gonna come to our office and then slip on the banana peels. And we'll laugh when they fall on their arses. But, we'll obviously help Elyse up." Gavin explains. 

"Right. Because we like Elyse." Jack nods.

A few seconds later, they could hear some muttering coming from down the hall. It was Funhaus, minus Peake and James.

"Okay. Here we go." Ryan whispered. Gavin got his phone ready.

"...those crazy moves of yours, Lawrence." they could hear Bruce say.

"Look, outside of Eleven Little Roosters, I have 2 left feet. I can't dance like that here!" Lawrence replies.

"Yeah, okay, buddy. You keep telling yourself that. I've seen your victory dances whenever you win at video games." Adam chuckled.

"Oh, bullshit! Look, I'll show you here and now that I suck at dancing." 

"This I've gotta see. Do your thing, Lars!" Elyse smirked.

"Watch my fantastic moves, Boyz!" Lawrence put on his fake German accent and started dancing around the hallway, not knowing that he was perfectly avoiding every banana peel on the ground.

"I wanna do that, too!" Elyse joined him and soon enough, the other FunHaus guys were dancing and grooving their way around the banana peels, not one out of place.

Once they got to the other side, Lawrence looked down to see the banana peels on the floor. "Huh. That's new. Did I just dance around those? Holy shit, I must be better than I thought!" 

"SURPRISE, BITCHES!" Michael burst through the door to the hallway with the others. (minus Ryan) But they slipped on their own banana peels, Jack slipping and leaning on Jeremy, which made them both fall over. Gavin squawked as he fell, his phone sliding out his hands, so he'd have something to protect his head. Luckily, he landed right on top of Michael.

Ryan just face-palmed at the sight of it all. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! Funhaus, what the fuck? You were supposed to slip on the peels, not us!" 

Bruce and Adam started cracking up. Elyse snickered at their costumes and Lawrence was just confused as hell.

"What the fuck are you doing, Achievement Hunter? This is almost as strange as when Burnie walked in when half the Funhaus office was naked." Adam laughed.

"Oh, God. They're doing that-that thing. The uh, 'number one' thing we saw on YouTube. With that guy and the kids show?" Bruce tried to explain.

"God damn it. GET THE FUCK OFF ME, GAVIN!" Michael yelled, while Gavin was tripping on his own feet trying to stand up.

"Sooo, this isn't going on YouTube right?" Jeremy asked.

"Well, I mean, it kinda has to, Lil J." Gavin replied. 

"Great. Tumblr has fanart fuel now." Jack muttered.

"Ohhh, I get it now! I recognize the costumes! You're that Robbie guy! Which one is the original?" Elyse asked. The AH guys pointed to Ryan.

"Not fucking surprised." Bruce chuckled. "How's the training going, Haywood?"

"These guys are the worst." Ryan answered, which made everyone chuckle. "The things we do for our fans, I swear..."

"You love 'em, though." Gavin smirked.

"Yeah. Yeah, I do. They're awesome." Ryan smiled. 

"Our fans are #1! HEY! HEY!" the AH guys sang. 

"Well, since you guys are dressed up and shit, I guess you don't need us today, right? We'll just hang out with Burnie and the cool kids of Rooster Teeth." Bruce smirked. Michael and Jack promptly flipped him off.

"Get in the office, assholes. Let's get our shit set up so we can beat you in every game we play today." Michael chuckled. "Just, uh...as long as it's not Overwatch. Please."

"We'll spare you this once, Michael." Elyse grinned as everyone, except Ryan and Jeremy entered the office.

"Well, Ryan? How was this whole Robbie Rotten experience for ya?" Jeremy asked, picking up the banana peels and throwing them away.

"I mean, it's not bad. But, it's not good, either. If I remember correctly, he eats cake all day. Maybe this costume was supposed to go to Matt Bragg." 

Jeremy laughed at this. "Oh, my God, yes. We gotta get him in one of these. That would be perfect! I'm sorry we didn't make the best, kid-friendly villains, Ry."

"I mean, I tried my best. I followed the master himself, but even that didn't work. I guess there's only one thing to do now."

"What's that?"

"Teach you the right way." Ryan smirked and held out his arm. His cracked crown zipped from its resting spot to his outstretched hand. With a CLING, he caught it and put it on his head.

"Yessss, Ryan. Teach us your ways, my Mad King. You are truly number one." The Mad Prince bowed to him, while Ryan gave his signature evil laugh.

"Damn right I am."

**Author's Note:**

> If you've made it to the end of this story, YOU are #1!
> 
> HEY! HEY!


End file.
